Martha, you have nothing to fear from me. Your throne is secure.

My first sewing machine!

Does it look like it cost $20? Yes. But does it sew? Heck yeeeeah.

The first project: A mini pillow for K's chair. Much to K's dismay, I've definitely caught the crafting bug. K is doomed to lose social acceptance if my visions of sewing all her kindergarten outfits play out.

Living for the here and now

K is now 17 months and surging ahead, with no concern for the past. I, however, lurk perpetually in the past, especially on evenings such as this when I'm going through her baby albums. I am silently desperate to clasp onto those moments so tightly, hoping to keep them fresh in my memory banks for as long as I can.

As I look through K's baby pictures, I feel like I am living some of the moments for the first time. This is because, sadly, I committed the worst of parenting crimes in that I failed to live in the present for much of these moments. I remember when K was a week old, I was thinking about when we'd ever reach the 12-week mark. When she reached 12 weeks, I yearned for all the allure that the 6-month stage held (solids! yay! what did i know!). When she graduated to 6 months, I pinned all my aspirations on 10 months - surely she would walk by then (again, i knew not for what i wished). I counted the days until she turned 12 months - surely that number contained magic? And as she inched toward 14 months...I held my breath for her first non mono-word sentence.

K has grown up too fast. I miss her grunting, instead of saying "momma, up, now!". I miss the the chubbiness, the drooling, compulsion to put everything into her mouth, the fascination with pulling herself up to a standing position before she plopped down again.

I'm determined to try harder tommorow to savor every unique moment that K offers up - the teething tanturms, insistence of running around unclothed and diaperless, the need to plunge headfist into every conceivable danger. I understand now why we shouldn't live in the future - it comes much too quickly!

The first family vacation, south beach style

We just returned from the "first" family vacation in South Beach, Miami (but have no j.lo glow to show for it - I guess spf 85 was a wee bit higher than neccessary). K experienced tons of "firsts": plane ride, beach sand, ocean, the pool, palm trees, seeing women running around topless, and art deco.
We actually ate everything but cuban food - the hotel was not within walking distance (in 90 degree humidity) of little havana, nor the rest of miami. So we spent most of our time on the beach, by the pool, eating at the pool restaurant and on Lincoln Road mall (which is a close approximation to being in a European city with all the euro[trash]peans lounging at the outdoor cafes chain smoking, sipping espresso and ordering a pound of bufala mozerella for dinner.)
Highlights of the trip include:

1) genius jones - a most delightful toy store!

2) ice box cafe - considered by some as home to the best cake in the u.s. after tasting the sour cream pecan coffee cake (for breakfast, might I add - aren't vacations sinfully indulgent?), we'd have to agree.

3) cafe con leche - strong cuban coffee +steamed milk + unknown and obscene quanitites of refined sugar = AH, NOW I'M BUZZED FOR THE NEXT 12 HOURS.

4) la sandwicherie - a french sandwich stand run by a group of italian men. the sandwiches were generous and fresh and packed with goodies (like a special french vinagerette).

5) friendship. we stayed in a hotel that was unfathomably spectacular due to the graciousness of j's friend. the setai lived up to the hype, but we missed out on the celebrity sightings since K's bedtime was 8pm. ah well, there's always next summer!

A few of our favorite moments...

The dog days of summer 2007

I have no reasonable idea as to what the "dog days of summer" refers but it was the only summer cliche that came to mind. And the phrase does conjure up images of running through lawn sprinklers and lemonade stands so it captures the spirit of today well as today marked the momumental 1st summer popsicle!

Nothing fancy went into making the popsicle - just some pear nectar diluted with water poured into an ikea popsicle kit. But a lot of trepidation was felt immediately before introducing the popsicle to K, a 15 mo who had not quite mastered the skill of holding a rapidly melting frozen treat w/o dropping it/letting it drip/refraining from hurling it across the room. I knew that short of putting her in the bathtub, a ominous sticky wet mess loomed in the near future. The OCD in me fiercely protested. But in the end, I was only too happy to present K with her popsicle. K's eyes grew wide as she tasted the cold treat. My soul swelled with the simple joy of the moment. Oh to taste a popsicle for the first time!

Too lazy to blog

I've been too lazy to blog lately. Ever since I got a library card from the local library, I've been borrowing books by the cartfuls to bring home, have them sit in a pile in the corner for three weeks untouched, accumulate a few days worth of overdue fines, and have them carted back to the library because reading books take time and time is scarce scarce scarce when there's an increasingly independent 14.5 month old in your life! K is truly coming into her own. These days, her favorite activities include:


1) Saying no
2) Still refusing to eat anything remotely healthy while saying no
3) Pulling every reachable item off the shelves at Target while I say no

Her major milestone is - ta da! - walking! Kind of. Her skill level when it comes to walking is somewhere between that of a hobbit and a graceful sumo wrestler. You'd know what I mean if you saw her in action.

Ah, the mismatched socks day. Sometimes K and I just throw caution to the wind and live life with abandon.

Here a couple more pics from the homefront to make up for the long absence...

The Mother's Day personality disorder

It still feels strange to celebrate Mother's Day as both daughter and mother. I was startled when strangers wished me a "happy mother's day" when they saw me and k together on Sunday.

Me? A Mother?

Sometimes I feel like I'm merely a benevolent guardian over k. I mean, I don't knit, sew or bake - can I still be a mother? For a vacation, I'd rather take k to napa valley rather than disney world - am I still a mother? I wear dangly earings from time to time, don't shop at Ann Taylor (because I like to wear pants that don't make my butt resemble a flat pancake), and still listen to hip hop - what kind of mother am I??

I hope k understands that the cloak of traditional motherhood doesn't fit me very well but that in place of being chauferred to soccer practices in a honda pilot suv, she'll appreciate the other ways we can bond as mother and daughter. For example, playing hide and seek under the table while mommy finishes her Sunday brunch!

Space and Convenience in the Suburbs: What's it worth?

In response to Christine's comments about the value of space and convenience in the suburbs...

SPACE

If you go from a 3800 sq. ft hom in the burbs to a 688 sq. ft. 1 bedroom apartment in the city with a child, you can appreciate living space. But here are a few possible reasons you may not value the extra square footage:

1) You are OCD about cleaning but tragically hate to clean (surely we can think of 1001 other things you'd rather do when your child is napping). How are you going to keep a 4 bedroom/2.5 bath home dust free for your toddler? (Obvious answer: Housekeeper. We finally found one after 3 months of searching.)

2) You are not a homebody and prefer being outside rather than being home - oops, nothing to really do outside the home in the burbs and now all that square footage going to waste...

3) You hate bugs - all bugs. But now you have a yard full of bugs. Did I mention the bees in the suburbs are 5 in. long and look demonic???? And ants...they infest every house, apt and condo. Theere are no escaping them!

4) You are up to the challenge of making the most out of space. I'm especially inspired by apartment therapy's smallest nursery contest - a 36 sq. ft nursery in a 550 sq ft apartment?? City dwellers have SO much imagination and creativity. http://nursery.apartmenttherapy.com/nursery/small-cool-2007-entries/14-owens-walkin-nursery-021563

I confess we do enjoy the 1300 sq footage we have now, compared to the walk-in closet in NYC. k has a playroom (which she rarely uses) and our "home office" is situated in our dining room with space to spare. And I'm giddy about being able to cook without using the stove top and sink as extra counter space. But I would gladly give up the extra room for the chance to step outside my door to grab a cup of coffe or walk to the park. Which leads me to the issue of convenience...

CONVENIENCE

Swimming/golf/tennis - ok, the burbs has all of these in abundance, but not within blocks of each other. More like within tens of miles of each other with a child in the back seat that does not take kindly to being chaufferred around. Theoretically, there is a starbucks on the way to gymboree class, but since stopping for coffee in the burbs entails parking, taking k out of the car seat, waiting in lines that move incredulously slow (apparently no one is in a hurry here), balancing coffee in one hand and k in the other arm (far too lazy to lug the stroller out of the trunk), and belting k back in her car seat, the coffee never happens.

I believe the city wins on the point of convience - in NYC, we were blessed to have trader joes, whole foods, garden of eden, food emporium and a farmer's market within 4 blocks of each other. And walking home from grocery shopping, I could get a pedicure, pick up a new cookbook, upgrade my wireless phone service, buy another yoga mat, get new sandals to showcase my pedicured feet and grab a croissant and cappucino good enough for the pope himself. Granted you could do some of these things at a mall, but then you have to deal with teenagers (yikes).